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Friday, January 14, 2011

A Forced Choice

Yesterday I was forced to make a choice.  I was given the option of being eligible to continue in the Living Donor Program OR being able to continue writing my blog.  If I want to donate my kidney and help a stranger, I can't talk about it in a blog, using social media or via traditional media.  This mandate was handed down by my social worker for one of the larger organizations tied to the program. I hope that they will entertain the indiscretion of this (last) post as I wanted to let everyone know why there would not be any more posts for awhile.

Because the end goal of helping someone is the most important thing to me, I decided to respect and comply with the request although I will continue to work with them, review their policy and determine if there is any room for compromise.   I do feel, in my opinion, this was not handled well-ultimatums never feel good especially in a situation like this. However the reasons for this policy, although not completely clear to me, must be in place for a reason.

I do regret the fact that I have lost what is a very important personal channel for me to voice my opinions, my feeling, my concerns and my experiences while I go through this journey.  I also regret the fact that this policy decision has destroyed a primary method of  communication to friends, family and coworkers who care a lot about me and are following my progress from across the country.  I deeply regret the lost opportunity to educate people about the process, as it happens and to generate awareness for the thousands of people living with and dying from kidney disease.

I do not regret my decision to donate.  I would not have made the decision without, in part, the education and understanding I have gained from reading the many blogs and stories, both Canadian and American, I have read in the last five months. I hope that at some point, people who develop these kind of policies are able to better weigh perceived risks with actual benefits such as awareness, increased living donations and better support for people who opt to start along this kind of path.

I am able to write about my experiences after it's all said and done....I will be doing that.  In the meantime, thank you for your interest and support-it has been wonderful.


Lauren